Saturday, January 16, 2010

The Xena Report

Hi. Woof. Xena here. I've been under the weather for over a month now. But don't worry, mom and dad have the best doctor on my case and he's determined to figure out what's wrong with me.

I've been having, well, lots of tummy distress. I've been throwing up. A lot. Sometimes twice a day.

We first went to the bad place doctor in mid December. Mommy had to get me some Pepcid-AC. I think it's people medicine, but dogs can take it too. All I know about pills is that they always come wrapped in cheese. Yum, cheese.

That stuff worked for a couple of weeks and then I started getting sick again, even while on the medicine. We went back to the doctor on Christmas Eve and he gave us (well, the doctor never really GIVES us anything) some new medicine to take. That worked for a couple of weeks and then I starting getting sick AGAIN. This is especially troublesome when it happens in the middle of the night. Sorry mom and dad. I feel really bad about this, but it's not my fault.

Yesterday we went to the doctor yet again and got a new liquid medicine. Mommy said it smells like cake. If that's what cake tastes like, I sure don't know what all the fuss is about. We all hope that this new medicine works. Oh, and I'm still taking the other 2 medicines too! That's a lot of cheese.

One of the bad side effects of this sickness is that they've completely taken me off cookies. No cookies at all. Never. This is just cruel. My appetite is still strong and I need even MORE food since I've been losing it so frequently. This is not fair. The doctor said dog cookies are the equivalent (big word for a dog, huh?) of donuts for people. I disagree. Donuts are deep fried and greasy, from what I hear. Dog cookies are baked and very dry. Sheesh, will someone please talk to this so-called doctor?

Nobody is sure what caused this in the first place. One of the ideas is that when I lick my paws to get rid of the snow and ice, I've ingested (another big word) some road salt, which could cause this to happen. Now I have to wear these stupid little booties on my feet when we walk along the road. They make me look like an over-groomed poodle. Pffft. I wouldn't let anyone take my picture wearing those ridiculous things.

*All of these pictures are pretty old. I'm much more beautiful now.

Thanks for listening.


Diane said...

Oh Xena, this is terrible! I am truly sorry to hear this. I'm sure this is as hard on Mom & Dad as it is on you. I am hoping you will be feeling better very soon. Hang in there! I will check back on you to see how you're doing. xo Diane

Pricilla said...

Ooooh, I am so very sorry. I hope you get better very soon. Maybe you could get booties that match your fur...

Merily said...

Aww, I hope you feel better soon, Xena!

cindy shake said...

Oh poor Xena!! Tauzer the Giant Schnauzer sends her love and licks... Though poor Tauzer is a bit loopy today, she had to have surgery yesterday on an ear hematoma she got last week :o( Take care and hope your tummy problem gets figured out!